Conforming To Motherhood My Way


I have been straddling two worlds for quite sometime.  As moms we strive for respect, but I feel like I had to give up my personal style and adapt to that which a mom “should be.” Switching out my ripped jeans to change into a cardigan just wasn’t cutting it. I have combed my hair, polished my shoes and even went so far as to buy a few “safe pieces” – in case of a random occasion. Truth is, I love being a mom but a lot of who I am is in my unique style and insane love for life. Conforming limited me and in most cases, is the reason why I ever failed. When I’m not true to myself, I am not living my best life.

One perfect example is my laugh. I am a genuinely happy person and once something tickles my soul, I let out an immense burst of happiness. I laugh loud. I am finally unapologetic about it because it is a sign of content and normal behavior for someone relishing in every moment. I live for the small details. I appreciate feeling whole and when I have a moment, I celebrate the hell out of life.

I also love to be inspired. I was born to be different. Why not take the risk and cut, dye and express myself? At one point I was trying a few new looks, “risky moves” they said.  I would be limiting myself if I never tried being a blonde, hell – doesn’t the expression say they have more fun? Sign me up!

I also do my best when I’m comfortable. Sneakers make me happy. I definitely love to get all dolled up and at that moment love to be admired, but there is nothing like the reliability of dancing in my sneakers and running through the streets without doubts and worries.

I have always seen my mother with her hair blown out and make-up spot on, that is my mom. Her scent of vanilla musk, make-up and hair products is what I associate her with. I also vividly remember her uniform scrubs. My kids see me very different. I’m a top knot, fresh face, hoodie and ripped jean kind of gal. In my defense, this is how I handle my most important business. Seriously.

Up until now I worked where nail polish was prohibited, perfume and earrings were not allowed and I was lost amongst a sea of white uniforms. Nothing about this represented me or my true authentic self. I was a chef and as part of the brigade, I blended in. Never stood out!


Once I started to find my way back, I felt the layers of concern melt away. I appeared as myself for once,  the interest started to build and my confidence did too.  My kids took note and it helped me encourage the same lesson for them. If they were comfortable in a Batman cape and ninja mask, then so be it. Why shy away from life because you are conforming? Embrace it and create a new imprint on society.

My organization, my blog and my writing have all benefitted from the uncloaking and now my followers realize who I am as an individual.
I stand behind my words of being true to yourself and encourage you to embrace all that makes you stand out. I may laugh loud, dress comfortable and live passionately now, but it wasn’t until I took the leap. What is holding you back?